by Todd Alan | Aug 22, 2010
In a world where lists of daily problems can seem never ending , getting in touch with creative ways to approach a solution may feel out of reach. Time schedules that tug on our attentions for results demanded now or sooner than we seem to have time to do them in can push us to edges where we feel cranky and start wishing for life to be different.
How many of us have been asked to produce results given another person’s time frame, letting go of what is important to us?
How many times have we put ourselves last on the list of priorities and by the end of the day seem to have nothing left in us?
It is hard for us to stay in a positive, creative, inspired mode of living when the lists are long, time feels short and demands for our attentions seem to not take weekends off.
I want to offer some ways to move your life from the questioning place of
‘If Only I had, If only I could, If only they would …. the energy sapping If Only’s” to a state of mind of – What if?
“What if I could? What if I had? What if life looked like? and see what happens to your mood, your outlook, and your results.
Now I am not asking you to entertain What if questions like my son comically added, “What if I did not have a little sister?” although that does take the mind down interesting thoughts…. I will save for a later post.
This exercise provides a way of being, thinking and doing that, if practiced, will over time deliver to you to a place of your own inner power and clear decision making.
Let’s begin…
Let’s take a scenario where you are being asked to finish a project in an aggressive timeframe and you do not think the work you will do in that time would be, if you had adequate time, to your liking. Bottom line is your want more time, so you do not sacrifice things on your plate that are important to you.
Do you:
1 – Say YES to the person asking for the result, and know that it will not get done in that time and you will explain it later when the ‘poo’ hits the fan?
2 – Say YES BUT by letting them know you have other things on your plate already getting your attention but you will do your best
3 – Or do you negotiate with the person who is asking for your time, showing the list of your priorities and fitting this one in in a way that honors your intentions first?
Many people I coach move from #1 to #2 and think that is ‘the best solution’, but #2 still has an essence of ‘If Only’ because you walk away thinking, “If only they knew all that is on my plate. If Only I could have more time and ask them for a realistic timeframe to accomplish this task”.
#3 Comes from an energy of ‘What If’ : What if I could show them all that I am committed to given my current time investment and negotiate with them on how to accomplish their task as well.
Now #3 type thinking has a freedom in it that allows creativity from both sides. If there is a feeling of attachment to the outcome, you will be right back at #2.
What do I mean by an attachment to the outcome…
if you fear of losing your job, have fear of not being considered a team player or fear of not being the one chosen to accomplish the task, there is an attachment to the outcome. Any and all fear imprisons your mind, your creativity and your inspiration. Attachment to any outcome, other than what is in the highest good and service for all involved, leads to feelings of resentment, remorse, and regret.
Have No Fear
Truthful communication, holding yourself as important, honors both you and the other person. This mindset is rich in creativity and connection. Moving into a place where you honor yourself will teach others to honor you as well and show them that you set healthy boundaries.
Approaching communication in a more honest and open manner may take time and practice but it can be done.
Role Play
I do role playing with my clients to help them approach a situation that may have in the past been sticky or not so easy to navigate. This way of working with a situation prior to it unfolds brings confidence and creativity to a situation. Then If Onlys turn easily into What if’s and solutions come easier with honor and respect on both ends.
If you are interested in learning more about What if mentality, write me with your sticky problem and let’s see how to mastermind your ‘What if’ solution.
Explore the boundaries of your prior ways of being by asking yourself serious
What if questions and see what unfolds in your world.
Tina Marie, Your Evokateur
www.tinamarie.com
by Todd Alan | Aug 21, 2010
Life comes at us at remarkable speeds. We wake to a lists of things to do, places to go, people who want our attention. Often in our days we seek refuge, a way to get away and find peace somewhere, anywhere. Sometimes we run from our own inner judgements and demands, failures and disappointments.
I share this video with you as your friend, one who has failed many, many times.One who has lost sight of her dream amidst opinions of others, of doubts of my abilities, of fear in the world, of comparing myself to others. I could write volumes on disappointments, betrayals, short comings and fear but that is not who or what I am, and it is not who or what you are either. We are much more, we are of that which made the Heavens and the Earth, of that which birthed nations and civilizations.
Take this time now to watch this video and know that we as a human planetary consciousness in physical form, unite to lift you up. No matter where you are, how alone you feel, how desperate it may seem, how painful the illness, how disappointing the circumstances, no matter how fearful your present may seem, there is ALWAYS an answer, support, love and honor for who and what you are.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDgVske63cY
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Fail forward my friends. Fail forward.And Never lose sight of your dream.
Tina Marie – The Evokateur.
www.tinamarie.com
by Todd Alan | Aug 20, 2010
If your kid’s are like mine, they turned to vampires over the summer. Many teenagers, tweens and young children are now on the verge of the dreaded ‘first day of school’ where they will need to wake up to meet daylight. How will they ever survive? And the more important question – How will we, the parents, stay sane during the first weeks of school when we all get back into a normal routine?
Here are a few tips to regulate the body’s internal clock naturally.
Coaxing the internal clock of your child back to a ‘wake at dawn’ and ‘rest at night’ resembles that same protocol that I counsel for international travelers who are experiencing jet lag.
Most Moms and Dads think by simply telling the child to go to bed and get some sleep that it will make the child sleepy and voila – off they go to dreamland. The problem is not solved that simply. Over time, as the child has stayed up later and later, and been active during night time hours, the cell structure and the intelligences that dictate cellular functions have adjusted their cycles for metabolic functions that occur on average over a twelve hour schedule.
While we are awake and active, the cell structures maintain a high metabolic function, then as we slow down, tire and require rest, the cells switch into the rest and rebuild phase associated with sleep. This pattern of activity and then rest and rebuild occurs in stages, that when affected by a child not sleeping normally over a long period of the summer months, needs to be reversed and set on a normal schedule again.
Exercise
Increase the exercise your child has in the last few days leading up to the start of school , walking, running, and being active will trigger the body to increase metabolism during the normal waking hours. When my daughter, who is 14, stays up all day after having pulled ‘an all-nighter’ she heads to the gym the next morning and runs a couple miles to keep her body ‘up’.
Many people think exercising will make you sleepier when in fact it will increase the energy your body has to operate provided you eat healthy foods and plenty of water.
Water intake
Increasing water intake to double what the child is used to will also stimulate body metabolism and help cleanse the body of cell debris that would normally take place if your child were sleeping during the day light hours. Plus, your child will be going to the bathroom more, and it is hard to sleep when on the toilet, but not impossible as I have discovered with my teenagers.
Cat Napping
We all enjoy a nap in the afternoon to refocus and re-energize. Well to the child who has stayed up all night and is now getting back on a normal schedule, a cat nap in the afternoon will be as valuable as the latest video game. Allow a 40 minute nap mid day but make sure you wake them, and you will have to wake them, then make sure they stay up the rest of the day till bedtime. Take them out and do an activity that requires movement or have them do chores around the house to help get things organized before school starts.
Foods that help
Increase greens, fresh fruits, and vegetables. Eat up to 6 cups of veggies a day and 2 cups of fresh fruits. Fresh fruits and veggies are high in fiber and not only provide easy to absorb vitamins and minerals but are also higher in water content, all of which help regulate normal body functions.
Stay away from pastas, sugars, coffee, breads during the day as they cause blood sugar fluctuations that make you feel sleepy.
Vitamins
Vitamin C, given 2 – 3 times during the day, all before 5 pm, helps cell overturn which is needed when normalizing body processes. Read bottle for quantities that are safe to take during the day.
Vitamin E if given toward the night time hours, promotes sleep. Again read the recommended dosages on the container.
Herbs that help
Place a few drops of lavender under pillow or in bath to calm and sooth the child at normal ‘get ready for bed hours’.
Chamomile tea (if your child does not suffer seasonal allergies), helps calm the child as your promote sleep.
Jet lag formulas – there are plenty jet lag herbal formulas on the market as well if you want to venture out and try a new product. I personally have not used them when I travel internationally.
I wish you all the best as you prepare your child for the ever popular ‘back to school’ days. Mom and Dad can use these same tips to keep your energy levels up and stay positive.
Your health advocate – Tina Marie
www.tinamarie.com
by Todd Alan | Aug 16, 2010
America – When are we going to have enough of this doom and gloom mentality?
It seems as soon as things start looking up as they have in the past weeks, as reported by the Citizen Economists, “U.S. Manufacturing Grows 12 Months Straight; Jobs Up in Sector 8 Months in a Row”, the nay sayers pipe up again and decide to mash us right where it hurts. In the Huffington Post today, Robert Reich, Former Secretary of Labor, reported that the rumors of a double dip recession are premature when a good majority of Americans have not experienced the end of the current ‘dip’. He goes on to uplift us (sarcasm injected) with stories of unemployment figures, anemic job growth figures, and rising health care costs. Read full article (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/robert-reich/forget-a-double-dip-were_b_682334.html)
Are we getting addicted to stories of ‘how bad it is’, ‘of how sick we are’, of ‘how many people are unemployed’, ‘of how hopeless it all is’?
Enough already!
This is not the America I know. The America I know is proud, finds solutions, is inventive, is resourceful, and kicks butt!
The America I know does not wait for anyone to bail us out, does not expect a free hand out, is determined and takes charge of the situation.
Give me a break – former third world economies are doing better than ours and we are sitting back and watching. Are you really o.k. with this? Have you forgotten this is a government for the people, by the people? Have you lost sight of all the opportunities around you? Where there is a need, their is a job. Where there is a problem, there is a solution.
I think we have let this boil fester long enough. Einstein said that “The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we created them.”
I am not asking people to turn a blind eye or live in some la la land where we ignore the obvious, I am asking you to stop telling the same old stories of how bad things are and look for ways to empower yourself. No one else is going to jump in to make your life happy, to fix your relationships, to feed you healthy food, to get your body to the gym for a workout. No one else is going to manage the voice inside your head telling you to get up and get out there. I know, I would have loved at times to have a drill sergeant visit my room each morning and whip my butt into shape. When it looked really bad, Sgt. Hartman was not available, it was my own doing to get my self up and out of bed, finding work, managing the household budget, being a single mother to my children.
If you are looking at a problem that seems scary, come at it from another angle.
This is a solution method that I write about in my upcoming book, (UNDER WRAPS),
Here is the gist of it…
When you do not know the answer, ask yourself, “If I did know the answer what would that be?” Listen and watch what opens up for you.
You want a drill sergeant waking you up, try this.
You want a motivational outlook on what is true in the economy and world, get your news here.
You ready to pop the boil of fear, discontent and suffering, go here.
by Todd Alan | Aug 16, 2010
One of the largest growing sectors of our economy is self help where an estimated $11 billion is spent every year from people seeking to improve their life conditions. Big name authors, speakers and teachers produce book after book, program after program that promise to hold the Holy Grail of how to transform your life from rags to riches, suffering to joy, and loneliness to love. Blooming up from the massive interest in personal growth is a job description that has had a variety of names over the decades yet delivers, in essence, the same service – listening. What we had spent thousands of dollars on in the 90’s each year in the form of therapy and counseling, has been replaced by people known as Life Coaches. Being a ‘coach’ myself, people ask me, “What qualifies you to be a coach?” and “What should I look for when I am considering hiring a coach?” All great questions. Now you may think I am aiming this toward my programs/books/sessions – it crossed my mind – but instead I have placed myself back in the seat of customer and will share with you what decision process I went through to hire my past and current life coaches.
I hope this helps. – Tina Marie
What certifies a person to be a Life Coach.
There are organizations and agencies that certify people through non-accredited programs where by meeting the qualifications the applicant is given the ability to call themselves a Certified Life Coach. Another option in being coached to be a Life Coach are programs produced by authors, teachers and retired business owners who have formed their own certification programs which will allow a person to resell an already marketed program, and be able to teach the programs to their own audiences.
In lieu of investing in a certified program that trains and provides guidance in your coaching business, some people will take on the title of Life Coach out of a personal program that they have developed from the amount of experience they have gained over their careers.
All avenues of access to people who are Life Coaches have their purpose and attraction to the audiences they serve. On your journey in choosing who you will work with, if that is the choice you make, use these points that I share here in assisting you in making a decision on what you are looking for in a Life Coach.
In unmasking the success of the self help industry, Steve Salerno, author of Sham: How the Self-Help Movement Made America Helpless, shares that “Whatever they think you’re deficient in, they’re selling the solution.”
Salerno’s beef: If they need another book or tape, the previous one must not have made good on its promise. “This industry is exploitative,” he says. “It takes advantage of people’s weaknesses.”
That’s not how the hundred’s of thousands of people flocking to the self help industry see it, of course. “People keep buying because they like to feel like they’re improving themselves,” says Brian Tracy, head of an eponymous self-help book-and-seminar outfit that grosses between $25 and $30 million, according to Marketdata. “The more you read, the more you grow. [Repeat customers] enjoy the study of self-help.”
Such study involves wrapping your head around theories like “listen to your heart” and “take responsibility for your actions”–part of a curriculum that helped Chopra pull in $1.3 million in 2008 from book sales and speaking engagements. (He now spends most of his time doing nonprofit work.)
What seems evident is that the self help industry is revealing that people are hungry to be heard, valued, supported and reminded that they, in fact, do possess the very answers they seek others to remind them of.
Why is Coaching so popular?
My theories on the throngs of seminar junkies, billions spent on books and audio programs that we fill our spare time with is that we are seeking the very connections and fulfillment that was once received in genuine conversation, a thing of the past in most families, and work places, replaced by text messaging, emails, conference calls and post-it notes.
It has not been uncommon to seek the answers from a mentor, a teacher, an advocate and person who has gone before in an effort to shorten our learning curve, in fact, it is considered among the highly successful, unwise to not find a coach or two to help guide us through our ‘unknowing.’ I share in my book, (UNDER WRAPS) “Left to our own devices, we seduce ourselves with naivety and insecurities. It is the wise who humbly sit at the feet of a teacher to find their way through the darkness.”
Life Coaches and those with titles like them; Success Coaches, and Consultants are filling a need, a need to be heard, a need to remind ourselves to focus on what is important, a reminder to do what fills our hearts instead of our bank accounts, then of course how to fill our bank accounts by doing what fills our hearts.
I experienced humility at a young age of 22 in the start of my first formal business, having found that I did not possess all the answers and that my business degree held few of the actual solutions to real world problems I would face.
I sought out the advice from a person who called himself a ‘serial entrepreneur’ and found I had hired my first Success Coach, Aka: Personal Business Advisor. Since that time, when I realized that I did not have the answers, when I felt stuck and as though I was swimming through molasses in any area of my life, health, career, relationships, spiritual guidance, I have sought a mentor that would hold the lantern that lit the path for me to follow.
Is Coaching Profitable?
For the ones who ‘get it’, – Yes. For the ones who think fixing people’s problems will make them a happy client – No.
My son put it eloquently recently when he shared with his sister, “If Mom did everything for us, we would never learn on our own. She won’t always be here to do it for us, we need to do it for ourselves.”
The same goes for coaching, when a client learns that you are a ‘teacher’, they learn to take responsibility for their own lives and form their own solutions. Your nudging and prodding keeps them on the path that they defined and reminds them when the dusk settles in the path they are on is one that leads to their own highest becoming.
Those who hold the light up to the doubt, and fear and have us march through our own hell then pat our backs on the other side, are the true life coaches.
Starting out coaches who gain an understanding of how to run a business, how to market themselves effectively and how to sell their programs and services will thrive in this market. Those who do not have well-rounded business skills need to seek a program out that teaches not only how to be a coach but also how to form your own business as a coach. Of course life is the best teacher but cutting that learning curve in half if not more it what a well designed coaching program can do. The coaching program I recommend, mainly because, I went through it and have profited greatly in less than 10 months is the LifeSoulutions Program build and designed by Mary Morrissey. (http://www.marymorrissey.com) Tell them Tina Marie sent you… I love boasting about how blogs work to generate interest.
Personally I can attest to the ability to make a six figure income being a Life Coach. Now it takes discipline and focus, the same principals that you will teach your own clients are the same principals that you will use on a daily basis. I will willingly share my formula for free to those who seek me out.
We all need a Life Coach
The truth is we all need a partner who is honest enough, detached enough, observant enough and present enough to help us produce our lives. Like a Director who sits beside the camera lens and watches as the scene unfolds, a coach can help you by seeing the whole picture from a different angle. Because as Les Brown, a dear friend of mine, and mentor, told me, “You cannot see the picture when you are in the frame.” We need, from time to time, that strong arm reminding us of our greatness.
Mary Morrissey, my personal coach and mentor, reminded me just recently when I was seducing myself as to the reasons not to take the path I knew in my heart would lead to a resolution because I had judged the action as ‘too harsh’ and ‘not nice’. Mary reminded me that I held the answer to the problem and by ignoring or acquiescing, I prolong my pain when in fact, I am at the doorway to the other side. She did not let me off the hook in following through in a timely manner on a action that needed to be taken and the result of her nudging – freedom, resolution and movement forward.
What does it cost?
I have paid between $125 an hour back in 1991 to $1,500.00 an hour in 2010. And truthfully, you get what you pay for. The consultants who command the high dollar rates, have paying clients, have accessible testimonials for you to call, have a resume that shows their failures as well as their successes and have a company built around them are what you are seeking.
I meet with my coach once a week on the telephone for 15 minutes. In prior coaching relationships, I met for 30 minutes once a week and sometimes split it up to two 15 minute sessions once at the beginning of the week and the second at the end of the week before the weekend. A coaching session is not a ‘how was your weekend’ call. They are very precise and to the point. You are paying by the minute after all.
I told a client once who was having difficulty getting a job and feared his unemployment would lead to the failing of his marriage that “Consider my services the ‘Anti-Divorce Court’ Coach.” He followed my lead, got his dream job, invested in himself and re-won the heart of his lovely bride. And I was much cheaper than divorce court – trust me!
The bottom line is that you would not trust your health with just anyone, at least I would hope not, then to goes to prove you should not trust the very expression of your livelihood into the world with anything less than a coach who has earned a “doctorate in experience”.
Interview your Life Coach
Do not be shy when considering such a working relationship. Hiring a Life Coach needs to take as much time as would bringing in a new business partner for your company. You need to trust them and be able to confide in them with all areas of your life, as all areas of your life are tightly integrated, even if it may not seem so at the outset. Check the article How to Interview your Life Coach.
Qualities of my best Coaches(Mentors):
They listen
They allow me to trust myself and my answers
They are truthful and are able to communicate the truth without making me wrong
They are willing to let me give it a shot and then critique afterward.
They do not try to fix me
They hold my feet to the fire to have me do what I said I would do and if I do not, they have me understand why
They have life experience that has put them through what I am in and want to get through myself
They know when they do not hold the answer people who can help and they are open to putting me in contact with those who can help me
They keep their schedules accessible so that my time with them is not interrupted and my needs are given their utmost attention
They let me design what the coaching time will look like
They hold faith in me even when I do not
Happy Coach Hunting.
– Tina Marie
Related Articles:
http://www.forbes.com/2009/01/15/self-help-industry-ent-sales-cx_ml_0115selfhelp.html
Additional Resources:
The Master Your Life Program, produced by Seer International
Purpose:
To teach effective decision making skills, communication, and real life application of understanding defining goals and creating vision statements. Curriculum enforces abilities to use the power of our thoughts, beliefs, habits and support mechanisms in our lives to reach our highest core value goals. Fits needs on business curriculum, relationships, health, and spiritual goals.
Testimonials:
One of the world’s top coaches, speakers and teachers. Tina Marie will teach you how to play full out in your life with amazing results in a time frame that you could not achieve on your own. Be sure you eat your Wheaties when you hire Tina Marie as your coach. She knows how to make things happen! Walt Temple, President, WTP Corp.
Dynamic, kind, caring, compassionate, funny and sweet with an ability to truly connect with any audience, this just barely scratches the surface when describing Tina Marie. In a nutshell, she is a gem. She continues to be a delight to work with professionally and I am forever grateful to consider her a friend.- Melissa Schmitz, Network Director, Voice America
I love to meet people like Tina Marie that work hard to find ways to continually improve their lives. I feel very fortunate when I meet people that share their knowledge and enrich my life, and here I am with a wonderful group of ladies guided by a very special person…Tina Marie. – Rosa Amira
“Thank You Tina!
You have an awesome energy to live and experience life at its fullest. In my opinion that is the mark of a great leader who’s passion and knowledge can not help but spill over to all those around them.” – Gary, The Renegade Dream Builder
Dream Big, Run Fast, Challenge yourself everyday.
Credibility:
I am a successful entrepreneur having contributed to client businesses, partnerships and my own ventures for over 20 years, including 4 of my own corporations. I have experience in complex sales, operations, business development and structuring, service, consulting, program development and take out, in the energy, personal development, technology, transportation, communications, and educational industries. I have worked for and with Fortune 100 corporations, mid size and small businesses and understand the varying level of complexities between the three. My strengths include customer service, employee development, media and social marketing, image branding, personality assessments and job description definition, value surveys, communications, and designing complex ‘out of the box’ solutions.
I help people see what they may be overlooking or have thought the put to bed. I help companies create value above and beyond their current image all for little to no additional investment cost. I transform and spark renewal in product lines and services. I enroll the workforce to design solutions and own the accountability of their own jobs in a way that frees the leaders to be visionaries and the staff to run the ship. I teach how to serve first, sell later and how to have an 85% or better close ratio through proper lead generation.
Current Availability:
As of August 2010, I have 4 openings for new coaching clients.
I take a work load of 10 clients to maintain my availability for each one.
Investment:
Please schedule a 15 minute call to assess a working relationship.
877-887-8462 or call info@tinamarie.com
by Todd Alan | Aug 15, 2010
My daughter sat in my home office one night and found in the chair cushion a hundred dollar bill. She said, “Hmmm, here you go Mom. Look what I found.” To which I replied “Unexpected money… the best kind.”
In reflecting on the concept of unexpected money, I realized that all that comes our way, if we had faith in the laws of the Universe, would be in fact, expected. If we believe that thoughts are things and that we hold the power to not only attract but mold our experiences, then it goes to follow that all our experiences, unexpected or not are really at some level expected. Genevieve Behrend shares in her book, Your Invisible Power ,which I highly recommend, that if in fact we direct energy to a desire and an experience comes our way that indicates our wish is coming or has come true, by getting excited about that experience as though it were a surprise or unexpected lessens the very faith in the power we command. Excitement then is a showing of lack of faith and, similarly, believing that we are lucky, blessed or otherwise something of favor in one moment and not in the next is forging yet another chasm between the understanding of our God nature and the opposite.
Allow all good fortune that comes into your experience be expected, all coincidence a reminder that you are, in fact, living from and expressing your God nature.
Happy cushion hunting.
Your friend, Tina Marie
www.tinamarie.com
by Todd Alan | Aug 14, 2010
August 17, 2010 Guest Thach Nguyen tune in to hear the powerful affects of contribution mentality and how it increases your health, happiness and overall prosperity. Join the show as philanthropist Thach Nguyen shares his inspirational story showing us all that anything is possible.
Thach Nguyen
As a realtor, developer and philanthropist Thach hopes to inspire and empower billions of people to reach for their dreams by sharing his life story and showing them that anything is possible. A Vietnamese refugee who once lived in a homeless shelter, Nguyen became a real estate agent with Windermere Real Estate in 1991. Through his legendary determination and persistent door knocking, he became one of Washington state’s top real estate producers. Nguyen later joined John L. Scott Real Estate where he sold more than 130 homes a year. He became a millionaire at age 27, three years ahead of his aggressive schedule. Today, he is the Founder and CEO of Thach Real Estate Group where his team continue to help families buy, sell and invest in real estate.
by Todd Alan | Aug 13, 2010
How have we placed so much attention on one little number? You by now know that many people consider Friday the 13th to be an unlucky day. In This interesting fear is known as paraskevidekatriaphobia. A big word that breaks down to mean “Fear of Friday”. This fear, or superstition, happens to be the most widely believed superstition in the United States.
So you may ponder, as I did – Where did the superstition around the number 13 originate?
And how can a day be considered so scary? How did the fear of a day rank among other common fears such as heights, snakes, spiders, and water?
Well, of course, part of is the “13” itself.
Interesting facts about 13 –
This has long been considered an unlucky number by several cultures. For example, the ancient Egyptians believe that humans went through twelve stages on earth, and the thirteenth one was the happy afterlife. While they didn’t see 13 as unlucky, it was often associated with death. This association spread to other cultures that ignored the Egyptians’ positive association with 13. Go figure.
Did you know that women generally experience 13 menses throughout a year. I concur, being female myself, that this can be seen as bad, especially some days where you feel like not getting out of bed. But that’s not what the ancients were thinking about. When the solar calendar, with its 12 months, replaced the lunar calendar, with its 13 months, the number 13 was looked down upon. This little number was in the wrong place at the wrong time.
And there’s more…
There was this famous dinner that had seats for 13… anyone recall the Last Supper? Judas, the one chosen to hold the hat of betrayer was the 13th guest, and we all know how that ended.
There are 13 witches in a coven.
But what about Friday?
Who in their right mind thought to tag one of the best day’s of the week with ‘bad luck’?
To find that answer we need to go back to Norse mythology. Freya was the goddess of fertility, and her sacred animal was the cat. Our sixth day of the week, Friday, was named after Freya. Because of this, some ancient cultures believed that Friday was the best day for a wedding, you know – marriage, procreation, babies. Now with the rise of Christianity and the frowning upon of pagen symbols, which cats, for some reason (maybe another blog post) were considered evil all now tied to Freya, who had a cat- turned the day – Friday – bad. So Freya, along with her cat, and her day, fell from grace.
Most people, textbooks, and historical records from my ancestors, as I am half irish, note that in 1066, on Friday, October 13, the final stage was set for the Battle of Hastings. That’s the day that William of Normandy demanded that Harold II of England hand over the throne to him. Harold declined, and the English troops fell to William’s army the next day. William the Conqueror took over Britain and changed the lives of the Anglo-Saxons forever. It’s understandable how they would view Friday the 13th with dread.
In more modern times, stock market crashes have taken place on Fridays, hence the term “Black Friday.”
So, if we add all the superstition surrounding the number 13 to the fear of Friday, we have Friday the 13th representing the fear of the number 13 and Friday all on one day.
People take this seriously?
Many high rises don’t have a 13th floor. Airports don’t have a Gate 13. Many towns skip from 12 to 14 when naming their streets. Lots of hotels avoid having a room #13. Airplanes lack a 13th aisle.
How often do we experience Friday the 13th?
How often do we have Fridays that fall on the 13th of the month? It changes from year to year. There can be from one to three Friday the thirteenths in a year. The next year to have three, a high number of occurrences, is 2012.
Pull 13 out of retirement
I say, let’s bring back the number 13, pull it out of retirement and give it a nobel meaning that recalls its early reverence in ancient culture. Make this a day when we tell 13 people we admire how important they are to us. Or gift 13 random people with a meaningful gift. Or donate 13 dollars to your favorite cause.
Our beliefs marked the day, our new beliefs can change it.
Happy Friday the 13th!
Hugz, Tina Marie
www.tinamarie.com
by Todd Alan | Aug 13, 2010
We are spiritual beings having a physical experience. But how many of us go through our days not connected to the knowing that we are so much more than physical in nature? I know I could raise my hand to that question on many days. If you could contemplate for a moment your body as a vehicle of experience and learning and that the very mechanisms of learning, if likened to the tools we use to learn a particular discipline like painting where we require paints and a canvas, are for us our senses, our ego, and our thoughts, then you will begin to see that we can use these tools of learning to shape the very picture we draw onto the canvas of our lives.
Keeping in perspective the full picture that forms the canvas of our lives requires stillness to connect with the knowing that we are so much more than physical. It has been suggested by many cultures a practice of stillness called meditation, where we allow the human physical experience to take a back seat for a moment and we reach into or out to, whichever your focal point, a place that holds keys to new ideas, new thoughts, greater perception, imagination, peace and love. Now for the analytical mind, of which I have trained and worked with many, and consider myself to be one, connecting to an unseen space, that elicits feelings of love may at first seem too new age or reminiscent of the hippie era, but trust me many geniuses, world leaders, people whom you and I would consider masters at their trades utilized the very practice of meditation to obtain their degree of mastery.

Albert Einstein
People like Thomas Edison, who took his famed cat naps, Thomas Jefferson, who went into his study to ponder, Henry David Thoreau who escaped to Walden for over 2 years to ‘suck the marrow out of life’, Albert Einstein, who knew the mind experiencing the problem was not the mind that would solve it all used their ability to connect to a higher knowing to master their craft.
For the student, which in fact we all are, I advise a daily practice of meditation to open the mind and create a discipline of focus. I truly believe the advent of ADD and ADHD and other labeled disorders that we are supposedly inflicted with are all remedied through the use of meditation. Teaching an ADD child (or adult) the practice of meditation is like getting a hummingbird to sit on your hand for an hour but it ispossible, so keep hope if your mind in one that wanders.
Meditation is a personal devotion to the knowing that we are much more than our physical forms and that in order for the physical form to serve from a more purposeful, masterful space in our day, we must begin the day with a ‘tapping in’ to that which fuels our spirit – the timeless, shapeless, cloud of knowing.
When you reach an impasse, feel frustrated, hear more negative talk in your mind or out of your mouth than you would care be in company with, find a place to be still, breathe into the calmness that is always accessible and know that you are a spiritual being having a physical experience, not the other way round.
Blessings, Tina Marie
www.tinamarie.com
by Todd Alan | Aug 10, 2010
Sending off your son or daughter to a college is a big step that many families are preparing for now. Stores are lined with dorm supplies, all intended to make your college experience one of fun and ease. We have taken time to pull together ways you can create a more natural, holistic and ‘geared toward learning’ experience for the college bound student.
According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, over 70% of of high school graduates in the United States have enrolled in college classes. With a majority of them deciding to live on campus or in nearby apartments, starting out the ‘living on your own’ experience in a holistic manner, will set your expectations for healthy living for many years to come.
Bedroom
Although they are away from home, and their schedules are full of classes, socializing and study, your college student still needs their sleep. Send them off with bedding that stands up to the college experience and keeps allergies at bay is needed.
Bathroom & Laundry
Environmentally friendly cleaners that can leave even the dirtiest dorm room sparkling and smelling amazingly clean. I love these products – they work, they are healthy for us (as far as we know), and they smell awesome – even guys like the smell.
Click Here
Teach your kids how to sort laundry, cleaning our clothes the way Mom teaches is needed to keep clothes looking great. Use products made for high efficiency washers and that are less stressful on the environment. Try Seventh Generation Products:
Click Here
Toiletries
Toothpaste, shampoo and conditioner, razors, toilet paper – all these choices are now up to the college bound student. How will you spend your money in the world? And keep yourself looking nice at the same time. You are now developing your money consciousness and how your impact on the world as a planetary being will be made. What impact do you want to have? Start simple. Here are some products that will have a lower impact on the Earth and have you looking, smelling and feeling wonderful! Dr. Tom has the
answer
The Environmental Working Group has a website called Skin Deep. This site is an excellent resource for consumers in that it lists thousands of personal care products in an organized way and rates them on how safe their ingredients are.
“Skin Deep pairs ingredients in more than 25,000 products against 50 definitive toxicity and regulatory databases, making it the largest integrated data resource of its kind. Why did a small nonprofit take on such a big project? Because the FDA doesn’t require companies to test their own products for safety.”
Recycling
Most dorms, apartment complexes and neighborhoods now have a recycling program in place. If you are interested in doing your part to minimize your carbon footprint, enroll your living co-habitants in your way of living. I have a sign above my garbage can that reads: “Can we Reuse, Reduce or Recycle?” The garbage can is smaller than the Recycle can, and there is a compost can in the kitchen as well. I do not readily recommend composting for college students because the smell can get really rank if the debris is not taken out daily. Plus I know of few colleges that have composting facilities here in the states. Find a way to have your school participate in composting at
Campus Zero Waste
Nutrition
Eating well has a huge impact on your ability to learn, retain and reuse what you are spending your time, energy and money to achieve. Some easy steps can create a very healthy foundation for your education. Plus when you are 90% good with your choices, you can be 10% bad and not feel so guilty. What a bargain!
How Tina Marie is Bad…
I love Smoothie King. Some think “Oh it is a smoothie – that is healthy.” Wrong! Tons of sugar, processed ingredients and in the one I love, ‘ice cream!’ Goodness. Now on the good side of being bad I love these delicious Raw Cookies carried at Whole Foods. But if you want to make
raw cookies try this recipes at our friends at
RawEpicurean.com
Keep cut veggies in frig for snacking. Of course the college sauce “Ranch Dressing” is a must as well. My friend Brian was in Scotland for Med School and only requested a case of ranch dressing every 3 months. I never knew that Ranch dressing was unique to America. ; )
When you eat out, or shop – choose green. Processed foods shorten your life span – not much to consider when you have the world at your doorstep but trust me as someone who emerged from college 10 pounds heavier, you will care at some point so why not care now?
Other great snacks include nuts, whole grain breads, and dried fruits.
Minimize or cut out all sugar – sugar is hidden in foods, snacks, drinks, sodas, juices. You may think you are being super healthy, but beware the very health drink you have can be wreaking havoc inside your body. Water is the best drink – 3 quarts a day is recommended. Do not think I am crazy it is true! Go find the article “Your Body is THIRSTY!” to learn how many diseases, maladies and issues we have that are caused solely from dehydration. You will be amazed!
Sleep
This one is a hard one for most college students but I tell you – it is supremely important! You do need 6 – 8 hours of sleep a night.
At
sleepdeprivation.com they reported that “With all the studying, partying and classes, sleep deprivation and college students go hand in hand. Most people need six to eight hours of sleep each night to function properly. However, studies find approximately 20 percent of college students suffer from sleeping disorders, including insomnia. College students who suffer from sleep disorders can experience irritability, anxiety and even weight gain.”
Spiritual Space & Practice
What does a spiritual practice have to do with college and higher learning? The real question is what doesn’t it? When we seek a higher place for ourselves in any regard, staying connected to our life’s passion guides us as we grow. Many of us seek knowledge and at the end of our learning have a ton of material we can think about but how many sit and have real thought? Thinking and thought are two different things. While you are in your studies stop and take time to connect with your higher self in quiet and stillness to stay grounded in all that you are acquiring in mind. More calm, more purpose, more freedom and more direction will be your benefits from creating a spiritual practice and maintaining it on a regular basis. See our articles on Creating a Sacred Space and What to do for Spiritual Practice (coming soon)
Your Best Life Advocate….
Tina Marie Jones
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