It often seems like a rite of passage to be bullied as a child at school. These experiences can be severe and lasting, or a one-time unpleasant experience. Regardless of the type or severity of the fearful and often humiliating experience, many children are deeply affected by bullying events.
In the day and age of social media and the internet, bullying has expanded to a new level for many children. No longer are they “safe” from the bully at home. Now, social media follows the victim 24/7.
The response society has given to bullying to this point provides little relief for children in the throes of it. Especially when many times the bullies are parents and/or teachers.
Now, Kelly Karius, our most recent guest on Life Mastery Radio, has created a system to help children, families, and schools react to, and treat bullying, differently. It’s a system which has provided amazing results.
“Families have changed the culture of their home. Kids use new skills on the bus to school. Children grow up and use the tools they’re taught in many areas of their life.”Kelly Karius
Kelly Karius is the creator of The Key Method of Communication, and one of the main pieces of her program is called The No Such Thing As A Bully System
“I started working on this after an experience when I was hired by parents to investigate a teacher who was allegedly mistreating kids. I wondered, what good does it do to teach kids about combating bullying, if parents and teachers aren’t practicing the proper skills to reinforce it.”Kelly Karius
Kelly knew children needed to be strengthened and taught to take control. After she’d completed her original book, Kelly describes an electric shock which went through her body, causing her to reread her book and remove the words “bully” and “victim” since these labels alone were exacerbating the bullying issues.
She began an immediate rewrite and published the book with a new title: No Such Thing as A Bully; Shred the Label, Save A Child.
“The labels we’ve given kids no longer work. Labels unfairly describe the person. Instead, we must look at the context of a person’s life and see what strengthening tools they need to change their bully actions.”Kelly Karius
Kelly explained we all use bully actions and victim responses. Rather than be labeled a bully, which can ruin a reputation, we should replace personal judgment, and focus on changing the behavior.
“Our program focuses on individual responsibility. Instead of saying you’re a bully, say that was a bully action. This prevents the cycle of bullying since bullies often get power from the title (reputation). Our program helps the victim’s response to the bully action. If there is no victim response, then the bully becomes powerless with nowhere to go.”Kelly Karius
If you’re like me, when you witness bullying, racism, and the like, paralysis can set in. You take no action. Kelly explained we often see a reflection of ourselves and don’t know how to manage that, which can also hold us back in the moment. Lastly, if we haven’t be trained in the actions we should take during events as described, that will also keep us from responding appropriately.
Kelly’s No Such Thing As A Bully system offers role plays as tools. These tools teach us how to handle situations.
Kelly suggests you explore the option of a No Such Thing as a Bully® Community Immersion in your community. Or present the idea of having people in your community certified in effective tools to strengthen youth and parents. This will provide a change to the fundamental systems that are creating a problem. More information is found at http://nosuchthingasabully.com
How do parents identify that bullying is happening to their child?
- Not letting you near their social media sites
- Quick emotional swing while looking at phone
- More internet use
“Our program works with any type of bullying – cyber bullying, sibling rivalry, bullying at work. We often overcomplicate it. The solution is always strengthening the kids and reversing the inaccurate thoughts. Checking in. Asking questions. Having conversations.”Kelly Karius
And folks, many times WE take bully actions. For instance, have YOU ever…
- …Left somebody out of your social circle?
- …Talked behind someone else’s back?
- …Hit somebody?
These describe bully actions. Rather than adopt the label “bully” it’s best to see that, without knowing it, we often participate in behaviors we’d advise our own children to avoid.
“The only thing we ever have control of is ourselves. Our interactions with others will affect us as much as we allow them to.”Kelly Karius
There are 25 Bully-Proofing-Protections in Kelly’s book. And they’re not just for children. They will help you at work, and in other relationships. We should all be careful with the example we set for the young people in our life as well.
Examine these actions about yourself:
- Do you laugh at or mock others in your child’s presence?
- Do you make derogatory jokes that others don’t appreciate?
- Do you engage in, or talk about physical violence as a resolution tactic?
When parents and adults (including teachers, clergymen, organizational leaders, and others) begin to practice the tools of No Such Thing As A Bully system themselves, their shift in behavior will affects the child, the family, schools, etc.
Kelly is offering you a gift, which includes 5 lessons. She asks you to consider this an urgent call to begin personal shifts.
Click Here: Bully-Proof Your Home
She also offers membership in her No Such Thing As A Bully Community for two years. Five people can become certified in each school to begin supporting the shift in bully behavior. Anyone involved will have access to Kelly for answers, ideas, and support. The certification process lasts 6 weeks, once a week.