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by Todd Alan

Once I sponsored a man in AA who was having some difficulty with a certain situation. One of those situations that’s hard to shake.

It had him down in the gutter, and was making him uncomfortable.

So, I had him do a little exercise that involved writing out three paragraphs. I call this the “magical potion”:

In paragraph 1, you write down the situation (this might actually be more like a sentence or two).

In paragraph 2, you write down the facts.

In paragraph 3, you write down the truth, careful to use good, positive descriptive words in this paragraph.

For example, let’s say you’re broke.

The situation is you don’t have any money.

The facts might be something like:
“The rent is $700.00 a month. I’m making $15.00 an hour at a part-time job. Currently, my employer doesn’t have more hours to give. I’m on food assistance. My roommate makes more money and is probably worried that I will come up short. I’m worried I’ll come up short. I can’t afford the show everyone’s going to tonight. And I want that cappuccino I see that woman drinking through the café window. But it’s probably five friggin’ dollars, and that’ll leave me with about 10 dollars for the rest of the week.”

The truth might be something like:
“I took an adventurous risk to transition into a different career. It’s only part-time for now, but it could be full-time later. It was a risk, but I felt solid enough to leap. I am perfectly capable of finding more work and making more money. I’m a kind person, a brave person, and I’ve had friends comment they wish they were courageous enough to take their own leap. Just because my culture tends to attach a person’s monetary worth to their personal worth does not mean I have to fall for it. I am loved, and I have a few special people in my life who want me to succeed. I am bold which can, sometimes, lead to these uncomfortable circumstances. I am an artist, which means I’m creative and will thus find a way to change my circumstances. I will have money again.”

It doesn’t seem like much but this potion has great power. It’s an exercise designed to change how you view the situation, which often changes the outcome of the situation. It’s also a demonstration of how the truth doesn’t necessarily match the facts.

To quote Wayne Dyer, when you change the way you look at things, you change the way things look.

The AA guy called me back within 3 hours and his entire perspective had changed. He was almost proud to be in that situation, as he knew it was making him stronger.

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